Family

A speaker at church mentioned Ozzy and Harriet as an example of American parents. Upon noticing the blank stares coming from the audience and noting he had just "aged himself" he asked: "What would be a couple nowadays?". Someone was quick to mention Jon and Kate. Gross.

The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet was a sitcom based on the real-life Nelson family which epitomized 1950's family life and the nuclear family. The ideal family propagated by the media included a hard-working father of integrity who honored his wife and who helped guide his sons through the difficulty of adolescents. While I understand that this is far more ideal then real-life I simply want to point out that the prominent picture of American family life shown in the media was actually what the Bible intended. Love, leadership, and a commitment to integrity and doing the right thing.

Jon and Kate we're married when they were in their mid-20's, college educated and financially stable. However, if one were to watch the show (and trust me...I love this show...those kids are precious) they would see a nagging wife and a passive husband. There was little teamwork witnessed between the couple. Now after only about a decade of marriage they are getting a divorce. There are now 8 children under 10 who live in a broken home. Jon already has a new girlfriend (who is only 22 by the way) and a NYC apartment a state apart from his 8 children. The divorce also came after months of speculation of both Jon and Kate's infidelity. This was the couple that came to mind for what American family's are...sick.

Is there any hope for our generation?

This weekend I got to stand in my best friend's wedding. The man she is marrying (Seth) comes from a beautiful family. The reason for this is so evidently their devotion to God and submission to the way God designed families. The were constantly serving each other and it was so clear that Seth's father played an integral role in leading their family and did it through seeking God. His mother and father were affectionate and it was clear that their children looked to them as a model of relationships. Seeing this family and understanding why they were the way there were gave me hope for our generation.

That hope comes from Christ. Yes, American families are broken mainly because people are broken. If we turn to Christ to cover this brokenness and seek His will in our life I think marriages and families still have a place in this world.

Someone asked once asked me "Why would you want to wake up next to the same person everyday for the rest of your life?" They thought the idea of marriage was trapping and limiting. I beg to differ. I found this writing in my journal...and I have no idea where it came from...I think it was a random forward sometime but I think this sums it up:

"Why? Because when you say I do it’s a vow that means forever. Because marriage is honored by God, created by God, and is a beautiful union between two people that love each other with genuine love. Why would I want to wake up to that person every day? Because I wouldn't be able to live without his smile. Because I don't think I could go on without his encouragement. Because his character makes me sit back in awe. Because I would forget how to laugh without his humor. Because his patience is as deep and wide as the sea. Because when I'm in the room I'm the only one he is looking at. Because he loves to grow in knowledge and wisdom. Because he loves children and they love him. Because he has a superman complex and wants to save the world. Because he is a servant of others and shares the love of Christ. Because his eyes say more then his mouth. Because his laugh is the best sound in the world. I could go on but I'll end with this--because love lasts forever. So as long as I am living, that would be why I want to wake up to him everyday for the rest of my life till the day I die. Because as the Bible says "Now abides these three: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love"

I think that is a picture of what it's meant to be...nothing about looks, money, sex, or similar hobbies. All about character, God, and love. I pray my generation would be full of people willing to step up and live a life devoted to God that gives hope to the idea of family.

Post-MAC life...

I'm on summer vacation! For the first time since summer 2007...and that was no summer of relaxation. Its been 1 month since I've been enjoying this miracle cultivated by no-longer active farm schedules...but I'm still so grateful!

What do you do with yourself after a year of 20 hour days?

1. Sleep. I'm averaging at least nine hours a night...sometimes 11. I was averaging 5 to 6. It is amazing to me the cognitive abilities and emotional stability that has returned to me.

2. Clean. Before summer it was actually safer to put shoes ON when entering my apartment. The floor was that disgusting. Now the dishes are done, you can see flat surfaces, and the carpet no longer initiates my gag reflex.

3. Cook. I forgot that you can be creative and have fun in the kitchen. Food for the past year has been lean cuisine and whatever I can shove in my mouth fast enough to make it to class on time. I've rediscovered meat and fresh vegetables. Mmmmmm...

4. Play. Soccer has re-entered my life as well as the Tour de France, ESPN, and whatever various sports possibilities pop up. I've actually run 4 out of 7 times this week. My mind and body are both happy...so are my pants.

5. Nothing. No, I haven't run out of a topic for number 5. I have, however, been able to enjoy moments in which I have nothing I need to do...no grading, no papers, no chores. I have seen sunsets, had wine with friends, and been at the lake with my family. None of these things has increased my productivity, but all of them have recovered my sanity.

t-minus 27 days until I depart for the real-world.

Moving Madness...

I've come to the conclusion that it is really tricky to figure out how to move across state lines. Here are some things that I am certain will pop up in a blog entry in a few months...

1. Is it a good idea to sign a lease for an apartment you have never seen?
Maybe it will turn out to be really convenient...maybe it will turn out to be terrible. Based on my current apartment I have a good shot at this being really convenient. I really only have a fear of bugs.

2. How directionally challenged am I?
Let's hope I can get around for awhile. There will be a few major disasters. I will be documenting them here...so get ready.

3. How much can one person hate/loath/dread/avoid at all costs looking like an idiot?
There are going to be A LOT of those moments as I try to figure out living alone. Hopefully there won't be more then one per day and the men in my life are prepared for a barrage of phone calls relating to plugs, fuses, bugs, broken sinks, and how to set up TV and cable. Let's hope the car holds out for at least sixth months before I need to address those problems...I have no clue what goes on under that hood.

4. How does independence work?
I really like my space and I really like being able to control everything about my personal living space. I'm ecstatic for an adventure and WAY over living in college (read: crappy) apartments. However, I also really like my friends and the boy is amazing...the excitement reading over leaving them is so far in the negative its about to hit the other side. Character growth, right? I'll be honest though...I have no fear when it comes to conquering cranky utility and bill people who will inevitably mess something up.

5. Do I have a grown up job?
O yea...the whole point of this is that I'm working. I'm sure that will be ridiculous...I can't even imagine what that is going to be like.

It's going to be an interesting year. My goal is to blog at least a little bit everyday. Wildness like this needs to be documented!

Priorities...

I usually dislike the forwards...but this is a pretty good one:

Mayonnaise Jar & Two Beers...

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 Beers.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full.


They agreed that it was...

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.


The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.


He then asked the students again if the jar was full.


They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.


Of course, the sand filled up everything else.


He asked once more if the jar was full.


The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two Beers=2 from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand.


The students laughed..

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.


The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.

The sand is everything else---the small stuff.


'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.


The same goes for life.


If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for= the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.


Spend time with your children.


Spend time with your parents.


Visit with grandparents.


Take time to get medical checkups.


Take your spouse out to dinner.


Play another 18 holes.


There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.


Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter.


Set your priorities.


The rest is just sand.


One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented.


The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.'

The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.

A simple math equation...

bathing suit shopping + graduate school = Special K diet begins on Monday.

I have recruited a teammate and our theory is that if we being our diet with the special K diet any diet we go on after those two weeks will seem abundant with choices. I'll keep you updated :0)

Mmmm...weekends

Woohoo! I love Friday nights because there is so much promise for rest, freedom, and randomness. The week is so busy...and it has been such a rigid schedule for the last year. Weekends are the saving grace that breaks the monotony.

This week was interesting. Student teaching has gotten to be a bit of a chore. Knowing that all of the other student-teachers are done for the year, but that we have six weeks to continue...ugh. Also, it was prom week so the kids were a bit wild and loved to include statements such as "Are you really going to make us work today?" Yes, I am.

They also had some amazing comments this week...the swine flu scare, impending pig dissection project, and the human body lessons have given them ample material.

A few highlights:

1. Doesn't ham come from hams?
2. Wait...girls have two holes?
3. What is a sphincter?
4. Cheese grows on trees.
5. Kidney stones can't hurt girls as much. They have babies.
6. Food must travel through the liver.
7. I'm not dissecting a pig. I can't get swine flu.
8. Large football player "you have to dissect it...I'll puke". Tiny blond girl "wuss."
9. You can get AIDS from lice
10. If you mix two different blood types together wouldn't the HIV cancel out?

Yea...a bit frightening. Now off to enjoy the weekend so I'm ready for another week of destroying crazy urban legends!


9.

Just jump...

I haven't reviewed my former posts so I'm not sure if I have outed myself yet as a Christian. This entry will do that.

There was a sermon a while back at my church relating to listening to what God is calling you to do and having the gusto to go and do it. There were plenty of examples listed and they were quite various...such as the courage to forgive the man in traffic who just tried to end your life with his merging or packing up and moving to a foreign country to serve the poor. Needless to say...it was quite a spread.

I hate sermon's like that. It's because as soon as they start you know something is going to land in your lap that you have to address and more often then not its going to be a challenge. Either something hard to do or just something you plain don't want to do. I'm sure there are a million examples in my life in which it is easy...but I have selective memory and only recall the things that sucked.

For me that was deciding where I was going to be next year. Now I have been aware of this decision since last June. I've had a year to think about it. Have I? Heck yes...every freaking day. This hasn't been an issue of procrastination. This has been an issue of issues.

I have some really big dreams...only I can't rank them...I want all of them. I am going to be a teacher then I will be a principal. Ideally, I'll end up superintendent of a school district, but that rolls onto the other stuff. That comes after I'm married and my 3 kids are securely placed in college and my puppy has become old and lazy.

An old nurse's advice to me was "think of where you want to be in 20, 15, 10 and 5 years and then make your current decisions according to how you're going to get there. However, when you are 22 how do you head towards married with kids and career at the same time? I don't know...you can't know that. Where do I jump then?

So I did that crazy thing that most Christians do and asked God to show me where to go. If you've done that before you probably know that old saying "be careful what you ask for". Understatement.

I got a job in Maryland...exactly where I wanted to be...at the second table I visited at the job fair. Then...I found out it was 10 minutes from where my friend is moving too. Then they were going to pay for me to relocate and give me a computer. Teachers don't get that stuff.

I'm kind of waiting for the blinking road sign to show up on my doorstep at this point.

So now dear readers you are all wondering why this could even be a hard decision to make. Remember the old nurse and the think about your life later thing? Yea...problem.

My ten years involves married, maybe the first kid, dog, and job. In Michigan, with a cute house and big kitchen because I'm obsessed with having people over for any conceivable event I can think of. Not to mention my entire family and the lovely cottage up north that plays host to a good portion of my favorite memories.

That my friend...makes it hard to jump. Because at 22 its all about me and adventures. At 30 I won't feel that way.

Now you can understand the "this was an issue of issues" thing. I struggle with the idea that God wants to take care of me. I know that He has a specific role for me in His kingdom, but I have this view that I am meant to be His worker and that the role I have probably won't include me getting the things I want. Namely, I have never really thought I'd get the whole marriage, family, and dog thing described above.

So...as I make/made this decision the thought process was "here is this great job because I have given you this passion to serve in disadvantage schools, but I need you to lay down your whole marriage/family/dog dream on the altar" So if you are familiar with the Abraham & Isaac story that reference makes sense...if not...go read it...here. Now...if I didn't have issues with thinking God wanted to take care of me...this wouldn't be such a big deal. I may even think God would give me the Abraham route and not take what I put on the alter.

However, such is life and I can't seem to wrap my head around the idea that God is the one who gave me these desires in the first place and that He loves me. That combination should lead one to trust that God knows what I need and that if I followed Him everything would be fine. As if that was an easy thing to do...

So this is the game plan. I'm going to take the job. I'm going to jump. It's terrifying. I made this decision last night. I woke up every hour last night. Ugh.

Here's the thing though. This verse is more true right now then at any other time. Which is pretty sweet. So here I am...about to graduate and I have a job lined up...a sweet job. I should feel secure and accomplished. Instead I feel humbled and so utterly reliant on God taking care of me that the loss of control is completely overwhelming. It's the most beautiful awful thing ever.

werd.

It's going to be an interesting landing...